How not to pick up chicks on a train
(We need a regular Tattler Tale after all this three-track reporting. But please share your three-track alternatives here.)
The early morning commute is generally quiet, particularly on the romantic front. You've got some couples cuddling and making googly eyes on the way to work, but never many pickup attempts.
Last Thursday was a big exception.
First, a guy in his mid-30s sits next to me. I see him looking around the car anxiously. At the next stop he gets up, walks down the aisle and sits next to another 30-ish woman. He pulls out his IPod earbuds, extends his hand to the woman and says, "Hi, I'm Chris."
She shakes his hand. He mutters something else to her, and then puts his earbuds back in.
That's not exactly a smooth move to pick up a woman.
Then there's the guy behind me. When I first encounter him, he had his feet up on the seat next to him and his hooded sweatshirt shrouding his face. He leans forward and asks me for a cigaret. I disappoint him.
Later in the trip, a woman boards and asks him to move his feet so she can sit. He does, and asks her for a cigaret. She too disappoints. Then he starts talking to her about work and her work. Finally he says, "I don't care about work. I could give a shit. I wish he would fire me. Yeah, I'm going into work today and saying, why doncha just fire me."
So there's your choice: the guy who makes a bold move and then ignores you, or the cigaret bumming guy who's about to get fired.
...or the girl who can't spell.
Posted by: Wagner | April 05, 2007 at 08:45 AM
Ignore, Wagner. Maybe they were male cigaret(tes)?
Whatta buncha weirdos. People's bizarre ideas about how to pick up others never fail to amuse me.
I went out on a date once with a guy who asked me out on the train (in a fairly normal way). Big mistake. Though he was dressed nicely on the train (having come from work where there) he showed up to our date in a stained t-shirt and shorts. I should have bailed then cause I later had to extricate myself from a near date-rape situation. Gross!
Posted by: Snarla | April 05, 2007 at 08:59 AM
Why are there no postings about the new C.T.A. blogs.Redeye has one.Monifa Thomas in the Sun-Times also has one.
Posted by: James Reyes | April 05, 2007 at 02:39 PM
cigarette
Posted by: Learn2Spell | April 05, 2007 at 03:30 PM
cigarette
Posted by: Learn2Spell | April 05, 2007 at 03:31 PM
There are some seriously weird ideas floating around on how to make an impression. (Whereas I of course was always couth and suavity themselves, back in the day ... but of course.)
"Cigaret" is listed as a variant spelling in the American Heritage Dictionary, by the way, and probably in most standard dictionaries. It has a particular history in Chicago, as it was the Tribune's spelling of the word for decades (along with many other simplified forms, due to Colonel McCormick's passion for spelling reform).
Posted by: Quondam El Rat | April 06, 2007 at 10:39 AM
What's the right way to pick someone up on the train, then? Sure, those guys surely didn't get it, but can you really blame them with all the conflicting information out there for guys in regards to dating?
Posted by: Curious | April 06, 2007 at 02:19 PM
I actually met my boyfriend on a (Metra) train - he asked me for the time as we were waiting to get off at our stop, then we started chatting about the growth in our suburb. It was that kind of awkward, "Should I ask him for his number?" thing as we both got off. Then, as we were standing waiting for the train to clear the tracks so we could go our merry ways, he did ask for my number... and we're still together six months later.
Posted by: TrainGirl | April 06, 2007 at 07:45 PM
The key to picking someone up on the train is to already be with someone once you board the train. That way, you'll only get the, "ohmygod, i was totally sitting behind this couple, and they were talking the *entire* train ride, it made me want to puke, can't you people learn that riding the train is supposed to be quiet!" or "a young couple boards the train. they appear oblivious to everyone around them. they hold hands quietly. they got up and exited the train at the chicago station. what a couple." stories..
Posted by: Joe Blow | April 07, 2007 at 02:12 AM
Joe,
I don't understand your comment, but it seems interesting. Do you mind re-posting, keeping simple grammatical rules in mind?
Posted by: Learn2Spell | April 07, 2007 at 11:57 AM
Why are there no postings about the new C.T.A. blogs.Redeye has one.Monifa Thomas in the Sun-Times also has one.
Posted by: James Reyes | April 05, 2007 at 02:39 PM
I can't answer for anyone else, but IMO, both the Redeye and the Suntimes are crappy papers I don't read.
Anyone else?
Posted by: Cheryl | April 08, 2007 at 11:28 AM