CTA Tattler

More slow zone work this weekend; WTTW transit clip

As usual, there's lots of track work across the CTA system this weekend. I'm feeling lazy, so here's the CTA press release, and below I do a straight copy-and-paste of pertinent info.

Blue Line Single Track in Effect This Weekend for Slow Zone Work
A single track will be in effect from Grand to Damen from
8 p.m. each night until 4 a.m. the following morning on Friday, August 31, Tuesday, September 4 and Wednesday, September 5. Customers will board and exit trains on the southbound side of the platform.

Red Line Trains to Temporarily Reroute to Elevated Tracks Next Week
Northbound Red Line trains from Cermak/Chinatown to Fullerton that normally operate through the subway will reroute to the elevated tracks from 9 p.m. each night to 5 a.m. the following morning on Tuesday, September 4 through Friday morning, September 7.

Southbound Red Line Service Temporarily Suspended at Jarvis, Morse and Loyola Stations
Southbound Red Line trains will be temporarily unable to stop at the Jarvis, Morse and Loyola stations from 6 a.m. until
4 p.m. on Saturday, September 1 and again from
10 p.m. each night until 4:30 a.m. the following morning from Tuesday, September 4 until Friday morning, September 7.

Red Line Trains Temporarily Reroute at Belmont
Southbound Red Line trains will operate on the Brown Line tracks at Belmont from 9 a.m. until 3 p.m. weekdays—with the exception of Labor Day—beginning Friday, August 31 until the fall. Customers should board on the Brown Line side of the platform at Belmont.

"Chicago Tonight" clip on transit funding

WTTW posted the tape of your own CTA Tattler talking with politicians about the funding crisis and how a fare hike would affect riders. Look for "August 29, 2007 - Will the governor derail the Illinois House proposal to bail out public transit?"

See you in September. And remember, Chicago Public Schools open Tuesday, so trains and buses will be more crowded. Enjoy the holiday weekend.

Transit bill advances; spirited discussion on "Chicago Tonight"

Senate Bill 572, which includes a 0.25% sales tax increase and a higher real estate transfer tax hike, passed out of the House Mass Transit Committee Tuesday by a strong 15-4 vote.

Committee Chair Rep. Julie Hamos (D-18th) has shown great leadership on this, pushing this best solution through negotiations, committee and, hopefully, next week the full House. She promises a House vote on Sept. 4. She told me Tuesday night she's keeping her fingers crossed that it will pass by a veto-proof margin of at least 60% of state representatives.

I chatted with Julie (I know her from neighborhood politics) Tuesday night before and after we both appeared on WTTW's Chicago Tonight to discuss the transit funding crisis. She's a smart person who truly is looking out for the best interests of CTA and Metra riders in pushing these small tax increases. (The increase would add a quarter in taxes to a $100 purchase.)

Also joining Rep. Hamos and myself on the panel were Will County Republican State Rep. Brent Hassert, and Gov. Blago's "Chief Operating Officer" John Filan.  A great, diverse panel.

Julie led off, talking with host Eddie Arruza about the bill that passed out of her committee Tuesday. Hassert was gracious and polite to Julie, lauding her leadership on the issue, but laying out how Republicans want more than just the transit bill. They want an improved capital budget, among other things.

Filan dragged out Blago's call for closing corporate loopholes instead of raising the sales tax. He mentioned Julie's transit bill includes $140 million that the state must match from funds it doesn't have. After the show, in the parking lot, I suggested to Filan that Blago take a bit of the $500 million-plus in "pork" that the Guv cut and apply it to the $140 million. I didn't get a reply on that suggestion.

Julie and Filan sparred a bit on the loopholes subject. Advantage Hamos on that one.

Later, the three of us -- Hamos, Filan and myself (Hassert went to see the Cubs lose) -- continued the funding discussion in the parking lot. It was off the record, but suffice it to say that Julie tried hard to bring Filan around to her viewpoint. He didn't budge.

As we got into our cars (I was too late getting home to take the CTA to the remote WTTW studios), Hamos threw up her hands and said: "I really wish there were a Plan B. But there isn't. This (sales tax increase) is still the best solution."

I agree. Do you?

Fair warning on fare hikes from the CTA

I got this email tonight from the CTA regarding the pending fare increases if the state Legislature fails to do its job and provide more funding. I'm assuming it sent to all Chicago Card Plus customers.

Dear Valued Chicago Card Plus Customer:

Due to insufficient state funding, the Chicago Transit Authority Board recently approved a contingency plan which includes changes to CTA service and fares. Without additional funding, this contingency plan will take effect on September 16, 2007. Customers who pay with cash or Transit Cards and use the CTA weekdays will pay higher fares at rail stations and on buses (depending on the time of day they ride). Fares will also increase for customers who use Chicago Card and Chicago Card Plus. Visit www.transitchicago.com to learn more about CTA's 2007 fare changes.

Under this plan, beginning September 16, the fare for Chicago Card and Chicago Card Plus customers will increase from $1.75 to $2.00 per ride, and 25¢ for a transfer (which allows two additional rides within two hours of issuance), regardless of the time of day. However, the bonus structure currently in place will remain, providing a $2 bonus for every $20 of Pay-Per-Use value added to an account. The cost of a 30-day unlimited Chicago Card Plus card will also increase from $75.00 to $84.00.

If the fare change goes into effect on September 16, the new $2.00 fare will be deducted from your Pay-Per-Use Chicago Card Plus account. Those who use the Chicago Card Plus 30-day unlimited ride pass, and whose reload occurs on or after September 16, will be charged the new rate of $84.00 on their accounts.

Chicago Card and Chicago Card Plus offer the best value for traveling on CTA. Thank you for choosing Chicago Card Plus as your fare payment option.

Transit rally sends the message -- we hope

About 200 transit fans joined the rally for more CTA and RTA funding Tuesday. (Like many who complained here, I couldn't make it due to work obligations. But to those of you who did attend, thank you!)

Da Mayor and state legislative leaders said all the right things apparently, and hopefully it wasn't too late for the mayor to bring out his fiery rhetoric.

Tribune report.

Crain's Chicago Business story.

Great Crain's photos.

Good CTA funding wrapup; Transit Rally Tuesday

If you didn't read Jon Hilkevitch's Getting Around column Monday in the Tribune, I recommend you do. It's a good update and analysis of what's happening on the CTA funding crisis.

Some nuggets:

"The sad reality that the state's politicians are allowing the mobility of the Chicago region to go down to the wire indicates to many observers that the RTA's "Moving Beyond Congestion" campaign on behalf of increased mass-transit funding has failed miserably, while enriching politically connected RTA consultants hired to run the campaign."

Hilkevitch then recaps the Hamos funding package I wrote about here.

Then he reports some new info:

"... A spokeswoman for the governor phoned transportation reporters late last week dismissing the claim by Hamos and the RTA that the transit funding package is limited to a regional tax increase in the six counties of northeastern Illinois."

And:

"There is still time to avert the threatened service cuts, the fare increases and what would be an accelerated shutdown of Chicago-area mass transit next year. The optimistic viewpoint argues that transit is too important to the region -- and to the state economy -- for politicians to stand idly by as witnesses to a train wreck. But an increasing contingent of experts is urging the public to prepare for harder commutes."

All the more reason to attend the . . .

Transit Rally Tuesday: Don't forget: 11:30 am Tuesday in the Thompson Center Plaza.

Elevated tracks gives horrifying view of wind's tree carnage

A trip on any of the CTA's elevated lines this weekend provided a bird's-eye of the awful destruction of trees and building wrought by 65-mph-plus winds on Thursday afternoon and evening.

I didn't traverse the entire length of the CTA's vast elevated train system this past weekend, but I think I can say with some certainty that the worst of the damage can be found in Graceland Cemetery

It's literally a crying shame to see all those huge, old trees uprooted in Graceland Cemetery, hard by the Red and Purple Line tracks. Of course, tombstones were upended as well.

And then there's the giant cottonwood tree that fell on back of the house on the north side of the Sheridan Red Line stop, just west of Byron's hot dog shop. My wife was on that platform during the storm, holding on to a pole for dear life, when she witnessed the tree go slamming into that house.

Unfortunately, I have no photos of the damage. I was searching for some of Graceland, but haven't found any. Have you?

I did find this one by Blipsman on Flickr that show CTA shelters weren't not too sheltering last Thursday night:

Tips on using CTA Alerts: Sign up, use Web site only

When I posted Friday about how our CTA Alerts group members had provided some great info about the commute home after Thursday's horrible rain storms, one commenter lamented that he could no longer read the alerts from the home page without being a member.

That's true. Upoc groups made that change so you had to be a member to view SMS posts on the CTA Alert group home page. I'll be working soon with my brother, Dan O'Neil, creator of CTA Alerts, on Version 2 of the alerts group to provide more functionality.

But until then, you can still look at the Web page for CTA Alerts info before commuting just by signing up. You can easily turn alerts on and off as you wish. Or always have alerts turned off and just use the Web site.

Go here for a previous post on this subject, and other handy tips.

And join the group here.

 

After the Alert: Orange Line training car derailment cuts Orange, Green service

The first CTA Alert came in at about 9:30 am Sunday (thanks Tony):

"Orange/Green disrupted south of Roos. No service between Roosevelt and Halsted/Orng or 35-Brnzvl-IIT/Grn."

One car on an Orange Line train used for training derailed at arount 14th Street and Wabash.

See NBC5 and Tribune coverage.

CTA Alerts come through for soaked, wind-blown commuters

Thursday was a great day to be a member of the CTA Alerts SMS group.

Amid the tornado sightings and heavy rains and howling winds and  flying trees, we got great, timely information from in-the-know members of the CTA Alerts group:

From about 4 pm till 10 pm, there were at least 25 alerts, ranging from trees fallen on the Blue Line to major Red Line delays to Metra lines being shut down.

Friends at work were asking me what the latest info was on the commute home. Be in the know about major CTA problems. Subscribe here to get CTA Alerts.

Click on the continuation to see the CTA Alerts information you missed yesterday.

   

Transit rally Tuesday in Thompson Center Plaza: Be there!

Just 24 days remain before fare hikes and service cuts go into effect Sept. 16 on CTA trains and buses. Now more than ever we must make our voices heard, and tell our state legislators to pass Senate Bill 572 (in pdf).

You can literally add your voice by screaming for legislative action at a public transit rally on Tuesday, Aug. 28, starting at 11:30 am at the Thompson Center Plaza, at Clark and Randolph.

Kudos to my State Rep. Julie Hamos for showing leadership on this issue.

Now, go directly to your calendar and put Aug. 28 on it.

Here's why eating is prohibited on the CTA

Pookie Marie's story here is instructive in understanding why the CTA prohibits eating and drinking on trains and buses:

Today at rush hour on the usually VERY nice and respectable #147 bus down Lake Shore Drive, a woman was sitting in the seat eating chicken and had some very strong sweet smelling barbecue sauce. She had her chicken bones and food paper in the seat next to her.

I sat down in the seat behind her to see what would unfold. Five people passed by this seat and no one confronted the chicken eater. A few times, the chicken-eating woman fell asleep as if he had narcolepsy and I was sure her meal was going to go all over the seat.

Well, a lady in a white top and light blue silk skirt asked to sit down. She was about to sit down on some goo and I said "Wait!" I handed her a slightly used paper towel but she was grateful to have even that to wipe the seat.

A few stops later, the chicken lady got up, with her sauced-bag and bones and greasy fingers, and proceeded to put her greasy hand on the back of the seat so she could brace herself to get up.

The lady with the nice outfit then proceeded to wipe the front, back, side, top and all around because the chicken eater didn't look like she was wearing very clean clothes.

The lady thanked me for handing her a paper towel to wipe all surfaces.

Now I think I'm going to carry some wet wipes so that I can wipe down the seats.

Now I was thinking, "Aha! This is what they experience on the Red Line all the time." But this is the first time on the usually respectable #147 express down Lake Shore Drive that I saw this happening.

Legs-spread-wide men raise ire of women passengers

It seems that comments from Deborah about how to deal with seat hogs touched a nerve with many female riders. She wrote:

"The worst offenders have to be the young men also in their 20s who feel entitled to take up three full seats on the subway by spreading their knees apart as far as possible. Must be a testosterone-driven territory-marking instinct."

This prompted comments from other women:

"I despise those men who spread their legs. Is their junk so big that they can't close their legs? Do they think that we women want an easy glimpse of their crotch?"

And:

"I can't tell you how liberating it is to finally see this in print: The guys that sit with their knees pushed into your leg because of their SUPER LARGE SCROTUMS! I don't believe it! Sometimes I'll push back or churn around a little bit and smile and say "excuse me", just trying to give them the hint to pull their legs together AND 99% OF THEM WON'T! Why?"

And Xtina even wrote a poem about the subject:

Please be polite
And sit upright
'Cause it is oh so rude
To spread your knees wide, dude!

or

If your Johnson is chilly,
Pull your knees in, Silly!

or how 'bout:

There are ladies on this train,
And straight dudes too,
They don't wanna feel your knees,
So keep your legs together, foo'!

Trish got in the poetic spirit too:

"My leg is not part of your seat.
Must you sprawl so to fit all your meat?
If your balls are so swollen
That you cannot hold 'em
Get treatment -- and be more discreet."

I'm very impressed by such creativity.

Now, I'm a guy, but I'm not a spreader. In fact, if I sit next to a spreader, I nudge him with my knee to signal to him to get out of my personal space.

So ladies, how big a problem is this? Do we need a rule on the CTA?

After the alert: A track interloper climbs the Morse embankment

The CTA Alert last Wednesday came first from a rider, not the CTA: "Red line sb sitting at granville. Power out b/c of someone on track at Jarvis."

Close. It actually happened at Morse, though the CTA didn't divulge such details: "SB Red line is back to normal after police activity at the Morse Station. SB Red delays expected for rest of rush hour."

So I asked a customer service agent, who said the guy climbed the embankment just north of Morse around Lunt, and walked the tracks to the station. Then he hopped onto the platform.

But an undercover cop on the Morse platform saw it all and called for backup. Meanwhile, a train was in the station when they shut the power off. The track interloper jumped on the train and made his way through the cars till he reached the first car.

Meanwhile, more cops came on the scene and literally grabbed the guy by his shirt, hustled him off the train, and cuffed him, without saying a word.

Chicago's finest at work. I mean, who knew undercover cops were working so hard and being so effective. The CTA agent said the undercover cops come nearly every day to Morse -- and other stops -- for a few hours.

I feel good about that.

"Temporary inconvenience; permanent improvement"

Those were the signs I saw on road construction projects growing up in Pittsburgh. And the CTA might as well put up similar signs, with all the slow-zone repair work these days.

And that's a good thing. Believe me, I am not complaining. Here's a rundown of what's happening when and where  this weekend and into next week. All details can be found here on the CTA site. Below are direct copies from the site of pertinent stuff.

Blue Line:  Single track between Grand and Division from 8 p.m. Friday, August 17 until 5 a.m. Saturday, August 18 and again from 8 p.m. Saturday, August 18 until 5 a.m. Sunday, August 19. Weeknights through mid-September, single tracks typically will be in effect from Grand to Division from 8 p.m. each night until 4 a.m. the following morning, Monday nights through Friday mornings.

Red Line: Southbound trains from Fullerton to Cermak/Chinatown that normally operate through the subway will be rerouted to the elevated tracks from 9 p.m. Sunday, August 19 until 5 a.m. Monday, August 20.

Northbound: From 9 p.m. to 5 a.m. Monday, August 20 through Thursday, August 23 and Monday, August 27 through Friday, August 31 northbound Red Line trains from Cermak/Chinatown to Fullerton that normally operate through the subway will reroute to the elevated tracks.

Southbound Red Line service temporarily suspended at Jarvis, Morse and Loyola Stations from 10 p.m. Friday, August 17 until 4:30 a.m. Saturday, August 18 and again from 10 p.m. each night until 4:30 a.m. each morning beginning Monday, August 20 through Friday, August 24.  See the site for more details.

Overnight Single Tracks in Effect on Red Line Subway: A single track will be in effect on the Red Line between the Grand and North/Clybourn stations from 11 p.m. Friday, August 17 until 6 a.m. Saturday, August 18 and again from 11 p.m. Saturday until 7 a.m. Sunday, August 19.

Also, be sure to check the same looong customer alert for news on getting to the Air and Water Show, the Reggae Festival, Taste of Austin, and the Beyonce concert!

A cane helps in getting seat hogs to move

This crazy commuting tale had me doing the proverbial "laugh out loud." It's from Deborah in New York City.  It was her response to "Confronting the rude seat hog."

A bag on the seat? You call that a problem? HA! Lemme tell you about some of the seat hogs on the New York public transportation system.

Big sweaty jocks in hockey uniforms and big hockey sticks will fill the front seats of the bus reserved for the disabled and elderly.

Often beautifully groomed Asian women in their 20s do the same, but these women typically refuse to move if asked to do so by an elderly/disabled person. They seem personally offended by the request!

The worst offenders have to be the young men (white, black, Latino) also in their 20s who feel entitled to take up three full seats on the subway by spreading their knees apart as far as possible. Must be a testosterone-driven territory-marking instinct.

These guys take up way more space than my fat behind ever could, and there's at least one of them on every subway car.

A public confession: I have lost my patience with all of these rude people. I am elderly and disabled and use a cane, and I will sit down wherever I like whenever there is a seat available.

If they don't move their stuff, legs, bags, etc., I will still lower my butt into the space that should be made available. If they still don't move, I will sit on top of their legs, bags, and hockey sticks as if I didn't notice them under me.

If they get huffy about it, I "very oh very accidentally" whack their calf/ankle/foot with my cane as I settle into the position I want. I sincerely apologize to them for my clumsiness.

Maybe because I am a disabled old lady, the situation doesn't escalate further. Yeah, I might "accidentally" whack a homeless psychopath and perhaps live to regret it.

In the meantime, I get my seat, dammit. Yeah, it's passive-aggressive or just plain aggressive . . . but it works.

Good thing most Tattler posts don't require Ambien Viagra Levitra Cialis comments

Some of you who monitor comments here might have noticed recently -- as Lady T did -- that my blog has been hit badly with spam comments.

Lotsa folks selling various erectile drugs, chocolate and beer, among other things.

Then I learned that TypePad allows me to ban individual words and URLs in comments, and took advantage of that feature.

So be warned: You won't be able to use such words as those appearing in the headline.

But now watch. My blog will suddenly get a spike in Google results for those same words. So you can't win.

Though I am very proud that CTA Tattler is the No. 1 Google result for "Hobo corner."

The City of Chicago's contribution to the CTA goes beyond $3 million

Myself and others have questioned why the City of Chicago funds the CTA with just $3 million in direct aid. So I put that question to CTA President Ron Huberman, and this was his reply:

"On the City contribution, a couple of points.   First, we should address the misperception that CTA is a city entity only.   Although the CTA is called the Chicago Transit Authority, the agency is a regional transit system that serves 40 suburbs, in addition to the city of Chicago.  CTA provides 81 percent of the public transit trips in the six-county region either with direct service or connecting service to Metra and Pace. The CTA also provides nearly half of all trips that have a suburban component.

"The City of Chicago helps fund CTA operations and provides much needed funding for capital improvements.  In fact, it is the only municipality that directly funds the CTA.  In addition to an annual contribution of $3 million, the City of Chicago pays more than $20 million annually to fund the Chicago Police Department’s Public Transportation Section, which provides security for a large part of the CTA system.

"The CTA has also generous support from the City of Chicago in restoring its facilities.  Since 1989, the City has invested about $850 million in CTA infrastructure projects, including building the Orange Line and renovating many stations in the Loop."

Some glimmers of hope for state CTA funding

I really was bummed Friday after learning the state Legislature had passed a budget without any CTA funding. But now I see there is still yet some hope, though not a strong likelihood.

On Friday, State Rep. Julie Hamos introduced Amendment No. 3 (pdf) to the Comprehensive Transit Legislation - Reform and Funding SB 572. Highlights include:

Revenue:
Increased operating funds to address the current financial crisis and provide stable funding for the future:

• 1/4 of 1% sales tax increase to be imposed by RTA in 6 northeastern IL counties ($280 million)
• Up to 3/10 of 1% real estate transfer tax (RETT) to be imposed by Chicago Mayor and City Council ($100 million)
• Continuation of state funding toward paratransit services for disabled riders computed as an additional 5% match on all revenues, effective in FY08 ($54 million already in introduced budget)
• 25% traditional state-funded match on new revenues (phased in: -0- in FY08, 12½% in FY09, 25% by FY10)

Expenditures:

• Closing the operating funding shortfalls for mainline service at Metra, Pace and CTA: Metra and Pace to receive 52% of new sales tax revenue generated in the region (respectively split 39% and 13%); CTA to receive 48%
• CTA to receive all Chicago-imposed RETT for pension and retiree healthcare costs
  Funding for $100 million ADA-mandated paratransit services for seniors and disabled provided by Pace
• Funding for new $20 million Suburban Commuter Mobility Fund flexible services provided by Pace
• Funding for new $10 million RTA Transit Innovation, Coordination and Enhancement (ICE) Fund
• Metra to receive new authorization for $1 billion of revenue bonds, as approved by the RTA Board

County Transportation Assistance:

• In 5 collar counties: additional 1/4 of 1% sales tax increase, imposed by RTA, to be used at each county's discretion for local road and other transportation projects ($120 million)

So that's some hope. The bad news is that at this time, it may not have enough votes to override the promised veto of Guv Rod, reports Sick Transit Chicago.

So it's another wait and see game here. And the Trib reports CTA President Ron Huberman "is actually relieved the legislature did not provide the $100 million the agency desperately needs to balance this year's operating budget." He prefers the long-term solution that Hamos is suggesting here.

And why not. It beats coming back every year hat-in-hand to a fractured, dysfunctional state Legislature.

Strangely, perhaps legislators make CTA riders victims of Huberman's success

I really didn't think "Doomsday" would come. I really did think that the Illinois Legislature was smart enough and brave enough to take care of the 1.6 million daily riders on the CTA and allocate approximately $80 million in a news state budget so the CTA could continue to operate without service cuts or fare increases.

It looks like I was wrong.

And it looks like maybe the legislators are making CTA riders the victims of Ron Huberman's belt-tightening success, strangely enough.

What I mean by that is, maybe the legislators saw that Huberman and his team did a great job in finding more cuts in administration, in tightening the belts, and in settling the union contract. Those cuts narrowed the funding gap. Then the legislators saw that the new service cuts weren't quite so draconian as originally proposed, and the fare increases were reduced a bit, and really not so bad for those with the Chicago Card.

So the legislators took the easy way out and didn't include any money for the CTA in the new budget. And somehow I doubt they will come back and allocate any more money to the CTA before the Sept. 16 start date for cuts and fare hikes.

Let's be clear about this folks. It's the state legislature and governor who have failed us here, not the CTA. There was a lot of anger here toward the CTA yesterday (and name-calling, since deleted) that I feel right now should be directed toward the legislature. Have at it, but keep it clean. No, the CTA is not perfect. But right now the problem is in the legislature. 

We got new leadership earlier this year at the CTA. Now we really need some new leadership in state government.

A shrunken contingency: Fewer service cuts, reduced fare hike set for Sept. 16

Pending news of more funds from Springfield, the CTA board Wednesday approved a new "doomsday plan" with fewer service cuts (pdf) -- 39 bus routes rather than 63 -- and fare increases (pdf) not quite as bad as originally suggested by the CTA. The Yellow and Purple/Evanston Express lines were rescued from the chopping block.

Since the first contingency plan was announced, the CTA has found about $18 million more in administrative cuts and efficiencies.

At CTA Tattler press time, it looked like the state legislature might pass a budget without money for the CTA. Keep an eye on the Tattler Yahoo news feed to the right for news as it breaks.

Bottom line on the fare hike: If you don't have a Chicago Card by now, what are you waiting for? Chicago Card users would see just a 25-cent fare increase ($2) at all times (peak or non-peak). Those who pay cash during peak hours (6:30-9:30 am and 4-7 pm weekdays) would pay $3 ($1 more) and $2.50 on a bus (50 cents more). 

Maggie stories: The humper and non-gay guy

Here are a couple quickies from the CTA riding experiences of Maggie:

Maggie is walking past the Randolph #60 bus shelter on East Randolph. There she sees a guy lying on the wooden bench humping it.

She enters Lake street station platform of the Red Line at 10:30 pm on a week night. She see a guy who is talking to himself -- certainly a common CTA sight. But everyone is packed at the other end of the station. He sits down next to her and says, "Hey,  Ice Princess," and continues talking to her with his hands moving through the air.

"Do you think I'm scary?"

"Well no, not really."

"Do you know that every man in the world is gay? I'm not gay but every other man is."

Maggie joins the other riders at the other end of the platform. 

Snow White and the Seven Crown

I board the Red Line northbound at Sheridan and move toward the Hobo Corner. Sitting in the seat on the other side of the HC is a tall, heavy-set man in his late 30s. He has a moustache, goatee, and male pattern baldness perfectly centered on the top of his head, much like a yarmulke.

He is watching Casino Royale on a small, silver DVD player. He is wearing a blindingly white sweatsuit, with snow-white tennis shoes. His entire outfit is absolutely without blemish.

As we near Wilson, he closes his DVD player, and pulls a half pint whiskey bottle out of his sweatsuit pocket. He uncaps the bottle and takes a really long pull. After which, he sighs contentedly, and replaces the bottle in the snowy depths of his sweatshirt hoodie pocket.

He stands up to exit, and turns to a small, prim, young woman with short, curly dark hair in a plaid nerd shirt. He abruptly asks her: "Do I have any dirt on the back of this? Any dirt, anywhere?"

The young woman shrugs and says, "No, you look just fine."

He gives his shoes once last once over and exits at Wilson.

A last wave - and then tears

A young couple stand chatting on the Belmont platform. She boards the Red Line, he stays behind on the platform to catch another train.

As she takes her seat on the Red, he waves enthusiastically at her through the window. Another happy couple bidding adieu as they head off to work.

Or so it seems.

As the train pulls away from Belmont, she starts crying. She's trying to be discreet, but the tears are obvious. She stops for a few minutes, and then suddenly screws up her face a bit and starts crying again.

She cries on and off till I get off at Grand. It's quite sad to witness. And it makes me wonder what exactly had sparked the tears. Another CTA mystery.

New Belmont platform, tracks ready for use Aug. 9

The new platform and tracks on the east side of the Belmont station will be put into use starting at 9 pm on Thursday, Aug. 9, the CTA has announced.

I'm looking forward to checking out the new platform. I wonder if the elevator and escalators will be working.

In other CTA news:

Canopy work at Sedgwick. Next weekend, northbound Brown Line trains will share the track with southbound trains to allow workers to install the canopy. From 1 a.m. Saturday, Aug. 11, to 4:30 a.m. Monday, Aug. 13,  northbound riders should board on the southbound side.

Weeknight Red Line reroutes to elevated tracks. The Red Line tunnel slow zone work picks up the pace next week when the northbound trains will run on the elevated tracks. From 9 pm till 5 am starting Monday, Aug. 6, through Thursday, Aug. 9, you'll have to use the elevated stops to catch a Red Line headed north. Also, the CTA says, "weeknights (Monday to Thursday) through November either northbound or southbound Red Line trains will be rerouted to the elevated tracks to allow crews to replace deteriorated wooden rail ties with concrete rail ties and eliminate slow zones from Grand to Clark/Division.

Satellite dishes vs. trees

Overheard from a 60-some-year-old lady to her 30ish son, on the Red Line on their way to a Cubs game:

"Usually when I come here to visit, I look at all the different satellite dishes on the houses. This year I'm noticing all the different varieties of trees. At least 12."

And: "Do you think we'll find our favorite beer vendor again this year?"

Made me want to raise a 16-ounce Bud with the lady.

A primer on CTA's rules for behavior

A reader last week who recently moved to Chicago asked me where she could find rules for behavior on the CTA. I couldn't find them on the CTA Web site, so I asked the CTA for them. Noelle Gaffney sent me a copy of the 1998 ordinance spelling out what we can and can't do on the CTA.

"Some of these rules are not posted because, as you will see when you read through them, they are common sense and widely understood in terms of behaviors that are not acceptable in a public place," Gaffney wrote in sharing them with me. (Clarification: Gaffney later today asked me to clarify that "many of these rules are posted and conveyed through announcements.  In my first email response to you I explained that the rules were generally posted at the location where it was most logical to place it.")

Fair enough. But some of them are interesting to know. So here goes:

Medicine only. It's illegal to "consume any food or beverage, excluding medicines." Keep the Tylenol handy in the slow zones.

Turn it down! It's illegal to "use an entertainment appliance, radio, musical instrument or other sound-emitting device, which is clearly audible to others." This was passed in 1998, but I gotta believe it covers the walkie-talkie-like Nextel and other squawking phones.

Those hazardous sleepers. It's illegal to "sleep or doze where such activity may be hazardous to such person or others or where such activity may interfere with the operation of the CTA's transit system." I'm not sure if that covers the "egregious sleepers" whom I have complained about.

Keep it in your mouth. It's illegal to "spit saliva, food, gum, tobacco or any other substance." Hmmm. You could be ticketed first for eating, and then spitting food.

La Leche League thanks you. You can't "expose one's breast, buttocks, or genitals on ... the CTA; provided that breast-feeding of infants does not violate this ordinance."

No cunnilingus or fellatio. It's illegal to "perform sexual intercourse or any other sex act, including but not limited to cunnilingus or fellatio." That was just a puerile excuse to use those words twice in one paragraph on this blog.

Gamblers begone!  You can't "use any shell game, sleight-of-hand or juggling trick (?!?), or any other game to cheat, defraud, or unlawfully obtain money." Has anyone seen a juggling trick?

No tracts or rave notices. And don't try to "post, stick, stamp, paint, or affix any sign, notice, circular, handbill, placard, poster, card, advertisement or other device calculated to attract the attention of the public."

Pepper spray is OK. It's illegal to possess or carry any pistol, revolver, firearm, dagger, stiletto, billie club, knife, stun gun, taser, mace, bludgeon, explosive device or other weapon." But this section does not apply to cops or jail and military personnel, or pepper spray.

And here's what happens to you violators: "A fine of not less than $100; a period of supervision; restitution; community service for not less than 30 and not more than 120 hours."

Download the PDF of the ordinance below.

Download cta_ordinance98126.pdf