It's barely 7 am on the long Red Line commute to the Loop from Howard. By Argyle, the train car is filling, but the woman in her late 50's is still protecting the aisle seat beside her with the worn, jam-packed messenger bag.
She herself wears a huge head scarf wrapped around her scowling face. At Argyle, a guy in his late 20s boards and immediately eyes the seat, standing expectantly next to it.
"Stop leaning on my seat!" barks the woman.
"I'm waiting for you to move your bag so I can sit down," he explains patiently.
"Move my bag! You're not sitting next to ME!"
"Lady, I paid my $2, and your bag didn't, so your bag doesn't get to ride in that seat for free."
"You don't get to sit next to me, you PERVERT!"
"Oh, please, don't flatter yourself."
"Don't flatter myself!?!" Ohhhh, you get away from me now, you pervert!"
"I'll tell you what lady. I'm going to go over there and sit next to someone who is not crazy!"
"Who's crazy?! I'm not crazy! Imagine, sitting down next to me, that's felonious; that's retarded!"
And no one else tried to sit next to her again.