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Of syphilis and off-peak riding

I need to ride the CTA more during the off-peak hours. Those of us drones just going to and from work are generally a boring bunch. (No offense guys. In the case of this blog, boring is good.)

It's just that I've just been getting my best CTA Tattler Tales at the off-peak hours.

Take last night for instance. It's about 9 p.m. traveling north on the Red Line. A punky-looking teen girl with reddish/purple turns to her mom, points at one the CTA ad cards and exclaims:

"Man, he's glad he got that syphilis test."

The ad shows a guy talking on a cell phone with a pretty woman in the background, saying, "Man, I'm glad I got that syphilis test. "

Now, why do you think he's glad?


I don't know, but I do know I need to get me an offpeak el ride soon so I can steal me one of those signs and frame it.

And the people in the new Reader ads? (The ones slanted to the side, with no text.) Creepy, with way too much hair volume going on.

After last Tuesday's election, I'm pretty sure 51 percent of our voters have syph. It does rot the brain, after all.

If you read the rest of the syphilis ad, you'll see that the best part is really the logo: Syphilis Testing - Just Part of the Routine. Routine? Really?

I was trying to puzzle that one out for myself. Why would one be glad to have gotten a syphillis test? If the results came back positive, I'd be really upset, not glad. More specifically, I would be upset with the test itself, as an all too common reaction to bad news is to blame the messenger (aka the syphillis test). If the results were negative, I would bemoan the waste of time and money the test took away from me. I cannot imagine a scenario in which I would be "glad" to have gotten a syphillis test.

And I most certainly would NOT talk about it in public on a cell phone!

What I've been trying to figure about that ad is what the woman figure in the background is supposed to mean in the context. Is she the woman the guy's going to sleep with but who insisted he get tested? Is she just some random passerby who's glad to overhear this hot-looking guy's been tested? Her expression is pretty sphinx-like. Any thoughts?

But... if he's glad he got the test because the Sphinx behind him is getting ready to give up the booty, why is he _calling some one on the phone right in front of her_??

"Man, I'm glad I got that syphilis test, because now that I'm negative I'm getting ready to HIT IT."

The other ad that is irritating me is one I saw on the 22 Clark St. bus, for Lava Life. It depicts a very average looking cartoon man holding on to a strap on the bus, looking over his shoulder at this hot, exotic, scantily clad cartoon woman in impossibly high heels, looking over her shoulder at him. And coming out from under her slightly up-turned skirt hem is a handful of little pinpoints of light, like fairy lights, aiming right for his crotch. It's like her butt is sending him glittery pheromone messages. Really bizarre.

hahaha, that 'punky-looking teen girl' was me

haha yea, the poster was my personal favorate

Haven't we all experienced the power of crotch telepathy illustrated in the Lava Life ads? I love those posters...

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